Friday, May 9, 2008

The Scheldt [COH]


Map © Planet CoH

- Never ever play this map.

- Do not play this map against humans.

- You can play against bots.

- I hate you Relic for torturing me with this shitty made map and your overpowered artilleries.

In case you've noticed, I am whining about how unfair it is to play Allies. Especially the British because of howitzers. Despite understanding what Sun Tzu said about killing your enemies, I never did like to eliminate my enemies using howitzers and artillery. I do not mind mortars, because it's quite squad support weapon. But artillery in Company of Heroes, are so overpowered, whoever takes British or American, can easily win the game by base raping your opponent.

Face it, just stop playing this game, how many times did you put a smile on your face, staring at the loading screen and plotting your movements, to have your opponents rushing over to the Island in Scheldt, blocking everything and starting to base rape you by howitzers. I don't mind if they're trying to bomb the shit out of my units assaulting the island, but base raping the wounded, I mean, fuck sake, read the Geneva Convention, have you been taught in school that the wounded and POWs are to be let go and no harm should come to them?

To play a fair fight in Company of Heroes is easy, never play against British who would base rape the fuck out of you. I always hated the artillery, it tilts the damn balance of the game. Zergling rush is easy to counter, British rush can be countered if you're experienced, countering Howitzers? Never. You won't be able to do it.

If they deny me resources, that is fine, I can bear with it. If they slaughtered half of my men, sure,I am to be blamed. But to base rape me, killing the remainder of my men, blowing up my structures and so forth, I fucking blame you. It's not like I did baserape you, all I did was innocently playing a fair battle against you, by going man against man, tanks against tanks.

Hence, I said, artillery is never a fair choice of attack. I played against numerous people, people who would go " GL HF" / "Goodluck have fun." labeled all over it and uses artillery to a MINIMUM by lobbing shells at your tanks or men. Hell, tank rushing me, is considered even more honorable than base raping people with artillery.

I played with a bunch of Aussies a while ago who just wants to win by any means, so they just lob me base with countless amount of artillery, my teammates weren't spared from this insidious act. After losing men left and right, I just quit, muttering a comment at whoever is responsible for baseraping me. As my instinct said it, the bastard wasn't satisfied yet, he PM me and tells me I'm a piece of shit, and all the baserape is part of "Object of Annihilation" Seriously, if you are at my end here, you're pulling your hair and screaming out what an asshole this guy is. First off, I lack resources, I lack men,I lack coordination with my teammate, you bastards sits at your end, bolstering up defenses and build even more artillery to kill my HQ. Build. More. Artillery.

I am really condoning the act of base rape or spawn rape or whatever, please, do not be a douche and uses baserape as a means of winning the game, anyone can do that, all you need is barricade yourself from the enemy, bombard them into submission. There is a reason this game is called "Company of Heroes" Valiant men fighting hard to regain territory or stop the advancing army, really, it's not called "Company of Baseraping You To Shizzles." There is no point in playing this game if people just base rape. No point at all.

Go and cry, Howiekids. Nobody likes people baseraping.


4 comments:

Alexace said...

some people hate playing as the british, some love it, some hate playing against the british, some love playing against the british.

but for me i HATE the british and their emplacement and mortars and howitzers pounding the shit out of everything. just tossing countless shells over barricaded choke points that now one can get across cause there is emplacements there as well.
anyway good post on your view on the brits, im sure a lot of angry german faction players agree

Alexace said...

some people hate playing as the british, some love it, some hate playing against the british, some love playing against the british.

but for me i HATE the british and their emplacement and mortars and howitzers pounding the shit out of everything. just tossing countless shells over barricaded choke points that now one can get across cause there is emplacements there as well.
anyway good post on your view on the brits, im sure a lot of angry german faction players agree

Unknown said...

I for one was quite annoyed and disgusted by your childish rant.

If you truly understood Sun Tzu you would apply the fundamentals of warfare and destroy your enemy. I will help you to understand how I do that against brit players.

First off, you have to evaluate your enemy and the units he is using and exploit the weaknesses you see by using the strengths in the units you possess. My trump card against Brit arty is the Wehr stuka. It is highly mobile and packs a big punch. 3 or 4 can easily destroy any Brit emplacement on the battlefield.

"Know your enemy and know yourself; in a hundred battles, you will never be defeated. When you are ignorant of the enemy but know yourself, your chances of winning or losing are equal. If ignorant both of your enemy and of yourself, you are sure to be defeated in every battle." -- Sun Tzu

Here is one major weakness of brit artillery (not withstanding priests, which are only granted late in the game). They are immobile!!! You have to exploit this major weakness if you hope to win against a brit arty player.

Sun Tzu says to make a false face with ordinary forces and then engage and destroy your enemies with extraordinary forces. Here is one way I do that against a Brit arty player. I will make a false face and make a frontal attack on their positions using ordinary forces (infantry, armored vehicles and such), threatening to overrun them and draw artillery fire. I will then use stukas, to engage and destroy their artillery. (I will of course move the stukas immediately after engaging to avoid counter battery fire). This ties the hands of a brit arty player and takes away his strongest play.

"The clever combatant imposes his will on the enemy, but does not allow the enemy's will to be imposed on him." -- Sun Tzu

If I don't have the manpower to make a frontal assault I will deliberately give Brit arty a very promising target. Once he engages with his arty I will once again use stukas to destroy his artillery.

"All warfare is based on deception. There is no place where espionage is not used. Offer the enemy bait to lure him. -- Sun Tzu

If the game is stalemating and the Brit player manages to get priest mobile artillery, I will use sniper spotters to infiltrate and pinpoint the priest locations so I can destroy them with...you guessed it...stukas!

"An army without spies is like a man without ears or eyes." -- Chia Lin

So perhaps instead of investing so much time writing a horrible blog about why you hate this map and players that win using all means available, you should return to The Art of War and begin to use the concepts and teachings found there to become successful. I do wish you good luck.

“Thus, what is of supreme importance in war is to attack the enemy's strategy.” -- Sun Tzu

Unknown said...

What is that ^^^^ translated in English?